Anxiety Makes Me Hate Myself and That’s Okay

For all the success I have had recovering from mental illness, the one thing I haven’t gotten over is my deep hatred for myself. Perhaps “hate” is a strong word; maybe “severely dislike” is a more fitting phrase, but I am not in the business of sugar coating my writing. When I lie awake at night and think about who I am, my anxiety makes me hate myself and that’s okay.

It’s okay because it is my life and I can make my own choices. I can define mental illness recovery, as well as my life, any way that I choose. I’m not locked into some formula that states I have to love myself in order to consider myself healthy. Perhaps hating yourself is too much for you to bear, and that is certainly fair, but I don’t live in your head and you don’t live in mine.